Tonight, in this first post, I am thinking about how easy it is to be distracted by the urgency of daily life in such a way that the things that are really important may be left by the wayside. Life on earth is lived in time and time is, it seems, principally characterized by a strict linearity. It is, as author Elbert Hubbard observed, "one damned thing after another". And it is not for everyone nor often for anyone to exert and sustain the kind of determined influence over the course of their life that they might prefer. Most of us spend a lot of our time doing things that are required of us, things not of our own choosing; things that may sustain life but do not necessarily bring joy.
What does this mean? In my view, it is the evidence of a Universal Law, a truth not unlike gravity. Our lives are not our own. No matter our social station, there are forces at work within us that drive us to a point of dissatisfaction. In this respect, it doesn't matter whether or not our lives are models of benevolence and generosity, or characterized by selfishness and insecurity. Mother Theresa was never satisfied with her efforts, though her good works and kindness are legend.
I think it is because we are built to serve, and that the drive to be and do, whether it is expressed in great or modest ways, flows from that innate feature. It is not something we learn but, rather, a design feature common to all people. I'm not an avid Bob Dylan fan, really, but I know of no more powerful and poetic contemporary expression of this principle than is found in his song "Gotta Serve Somebody".
Another Universal Law is what is commonly called "free will". There is a lot that can be discussed with respect to free will, and some might think there is a conflict between the seemingly deterministic observations in the previous paragraphs and the notion that it exists at all. But that is not the case. It is this freedom to choose that determines not if we will serve, but whom we will serve. And make no mistake; not choosing is in itself a distinct choice.
So where do dreams go? What do we do with our hearts unrequited desires and ambitions? Do we get to do what we want to do, and what does that mean? Where do such ideas come from and what is their worth?
For me, a lot of this became clear when I realized what it was I was created for. I don't have all the answers, by any means. But I do have some of them, and I know where the rest of them are I think. And I know one day I'll get to them. Although I don't always live as though I remember and understand what I was created for, there is a level of understanding, a deep timbre within me that reminds me, restrains me when I stray too far.
We are all meant to live for so much more than what we know see.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
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